Do It For Nancy

I'm sitting here in the 5 o'clock hour waiting for Joe Biden to be interviewed by Morning Joe on television. Not because I have any great interest in watching morning television because I simply don't. Nor do I have any interest in the idiocy that passes for morning television especially expressed by the host of the Morning Joe show. His politics are insanely anti-Trump and the politics of his guests, unsurprisingly, are simpatico with those of the shows host. Just a bunch of loons in my humble opinion.

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But the demented Joe Biden? That's an interview you don't want to miss. Not because he's a compelling public figure because he is not. That said, he is the presumptive democrat nominee for the presidency in the year of the lord 2020. Yet, it has been alleged that he raped one of the women in his office some twenty years ago. This will be the first time he has addressed the charge in public. There may not be any DNA but there are corroborating witnesses that will attest to Biden's alleged deviancy on behalf of the victim, one Tara Reade.

For better or worse, Joe Biden has to address the charges in order to put them behind him as he heads down the final stretch into November. That's a tall order for a man who is clearly in cognitive decline bordering on dementia. It may well accrue to Biden's benefit that he can't remember what he had for breakfast this very morning much less what liberties he may or may not have taken with a woman in his office 20 plus years ago. You can bet your bottom dollar that good ole Morning Joe will do nothing to help his namesake, Sleepy Joe Biden, resurrect those moments however tawdry and delicious they may have been at the time.

There is no credible hue and cry by the left to have their party's nominee come clean but with each passing day there is yet another witness stepping forward with a tale to tell and it makes for a sloppy and choppy news cycle that is not helpful to the Biden campaign. It also doesn't help that we have all had a front seat to Biden's inarticulate and bumbling utterances over these past many months when trying to express himself. How does one convincingly acquit oneself when you can't find that your words and memories, mischievous or not, are at best a bloody blur?

Maybe he just denies it. That will require that he string together four words. A mere utterance when you consider the panoply of nouns and verbs that might have come tumbling out of his mouth in days of old. It will be a he said - she said. Maybe that will suffice in order to satisfy those supporters of his who have been waiting for him to say something, anything. It isn't credible knowing what we know about all the corroborating voices but it may be enough. This is the same man, mind you, that is on video time and time again snuggling up to, sniffing, and stroking prepubescent children in ways that will make your skin crawl.

Yep, the interview has now come and gone. Sleepy Joe has taken my advice and has issued a flat denial. Whether that holds up to the test of time is yet to be seen. I'm thinking that the loudest voices on the left looking for more are hoping against hope that this ordeal will see Biden leaving the race with another less damaged and more attractive candidate taking his place. After all, the goal is to defeat Trump and take back the reins of power in Washington. The loudest voices on the right should be careful what they wish for.

But I digress. I found a statistic on Covid-19 that I like and one that provides a nice comparison if you live in a particular state and want your state to return to normal. Here in New Hampshire, we have 5 deaths per 100,000 citizens. New York has 121 deaths per 100,000 citizens. New Hampshire will now allow all retail establishments to reopen by May 11th with certain guidelines that are designed to "keep people safe." That seems reasonable given the mortality rate of this virus and what we now know about which populations are at the greatest risk.

Citizens of states with similar death rates as NH are up in arms and have taken to the streets across the country to demonstrate against the heavy hand of government that would keep their states shut down a moment more than is necessary. It comes as no surprise to anyone that the states with the most restrictive policies are states with democrats in the corner office. They are giving the middle finger to Constitutional norms and they are wielding power that they do not otherwise possess in their role as governor of their state. This will not end well.

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So it's a good thing that we're starting to get back to normal or whatever that passes for these days. I, for one, will be happy not to be wearing a mask again. I hate that fucking thing. I see people going about their business while not wearing one and I think to myself, what's up with that? I'm not so strident and dictatorial as to think that they need to put one on and I need to remind them of that fact but rather I'm wanting to know why they think it works for them one way or another not to wear one. I'm open to alternatives.

I have to admit that I have not been feeling all that great this past week or so. Not sure what that is or what it means. I have birthday cards I haven't opened, calls I haven't returned from a week ago or more, foods that used to interest me that I no longer long for, and piles of leaves in and around the yard that should have been cleaned up weeks ago.

I've even lost interest in my afternoon coffees if you can believe that. The only reason I'm drinking any coffee at all has more to do with not wanting the headache that goes along with missing my daily dose of caffeine.

If I go for a drive just to get out of the house in the late afternoon, it's only because Nancy wants to do that and not because I have the interest or the strength to push back. I know the lawn will need mowing sometime soon and I am dreading the day. Maybe I will return from the dead to do what needs to be done. Maybe not.

If this decline that I find myself in worsens I'm not sure how that will end up. How much of this is due to the disorder of the world around me at the moment is unknown. Is there something that I did before this coronavirus thing came along that I no longer do that has now become a trigger of bad things?

It's not a "stay in bed and pull the covers over your head" kind of malaise but I can see it going there. That is a very dark place to be sure. Sometimes you need to hit bottom before you can get your sea legs back and I'm floating around on a raft full of holes with sharks circling minute in and minute out.

Having little or no desire to have a proper meal is probably not helping. How much cereal for dinner is too much cereal for dinner? I do myself a favor and try to avoid putting sweet things on my cereal that will spike my sugars and maybe even bring lower lows.

I'm putting on some music that mirrors my mood. It's pure unadulterated melancholy but it strikes the right cord. I was hoping that I might have a better day today but I'm not sure now.

This was how yesterday started and we all know how that ended. It might surprise you to know that I'm getting my bike rides in in the midst of this somnambulistic slumber. Habits are hard to break so I pick myself up and get on with it. I'm not hoping that endorphins will bring me back from the brink so I ride without hope and without real commitment. Riding without a mask as I do tells you something about how careless I've become as of late.

Funny thing is that I usually don't write in this here journal when I'm not otherwise up to it. You'd think with everything I've said here that this would be one of those days so maybe there's something else going on. Something that can be fixed or easily remedied.

I'll try to put my finger on it so I can start to think more clearly, start to eat better, start to do the things that need to be done. I need to turn this clunker around on the highway of life and rejoin the world already in progress. Stop the merry-go-round just long enough for me to get a foothold, will ya? If not for me, do it for Nancy.