Reality Redux
21/11/15 08:36
One thing I'll say about this retirement business is that it doesn't happen overnight. You are at work one day and gone the next. It sounds easy but nothing could be further from the truth. Your brain has been mapped over the years to accommodate the concept and reality of work not just in terms of where you go day in and day out but how you think and what you see or think you see in the course of your daily routines. Add to that the fact that the lens through which you experience that reality is constructed in such a way as to only let so much light in at one time given your capacity as an individual to cope with that reality and you start to understand how not working after working for decades can be both a mind bending and mind altering experience. It's no wonder some people have an epic fail in their lives once retired given the enormity of that which is hard to predict, hard to understand, and hard to prepare for. The best advice I would give to someone staring down retirement is to not to do anything extraordinary until you've eliminated every last vestige of the work experience roaming around in your head. That may take days, months, or years. Wait until you start to see the world in a different light. When you allow that light to reflect on areas long kept in the dark you realize that there is more to your existence than you thought and the path ahead begins to clear. It doesn't mean you are rid of your ways or those that come closest to defining you but you are essentially ready to take the next step. When you hear the words in your head "come hither" step into the abyss with all the passion and energy you can muster and never look back. Not sure I'm there yet but I think I'm getting close.
Speaking of "seeing" I feel like I've been thrown off the stage and into the proverbial mosh pit where my illusory fans have now caught me and are rocking me from side to side keeping me both elevated and off my feet. I'm looking at the ceiling all of a sudden and I'm starting to see things I've never seen before. Never bothered to look at the "ceiling" before truth be told. Never been swept off my feet either so until someone tells me differently I think it's all good. But I'm staring small. Keeping the focus local and within arms reach. I'm seeing things around the house that I've not seen before. Things that have long been overlooked or perhaps even purposely avoided for one reason or other. How those observations occupy the space in my brain is another question. If they become manic in nature that is not a good thing. If I try to make up for decades of abuse or neglect in one fell swoop that may be a recipe for disaster. If my approach is orderly and methodical then I can understandably revel in the satisfaction one ordinarily gets from checking things off on their to-do list. The plans of mice and men are all well and good and thus far have not gone awry. My lists are intact; My daily goals modest and predictable; My learning curve steep but still in scope; and the results thus far have exceeded expectations. Maybe there is irony in the fact that the combined forces of energy and creativity that made me so successful at work are now in play in this post-work environment. Reminds me a little of the chicken and egg argument. The answer to that notwithstanding, it's full speed ahead here on the home front. Are we having fun yet?
Looks like Thanksgiving is going to be the same ole same ole this year. I wouldn't mind breaking with tradition and doing something a little different but that appears not to be in the cards. I'm listening to Arlo Guthrie's version of Alice's Restaurant on Sirius at the moment so I probably need to get with the program and get my head back in the game. With two elements gone in our stove, we have plans to have a new oven delivered the day before Thanksgiving so I can't use that as an excuse for not participating. I think the only thing we don't have aside from the oven is the turkey and I don't have a good reason for not collecting that sucker given my availability these days. I think it's safe to say my heart isn't in it this year. Have we beat that horse to death yet? Can you blame me for wanting to do something different? It isn't about you, Johnny boy. Never has been if you want to know the truth. Wake up and smell the coffee. Did I tell you that I was thinking about offering to walk our neighbors dog in the event she isn't up to it? I've decided it is probably not a good idea to open that door for a variety of reasons. Improbable as it seems, I don't want to become a default caretaker for the little fella in the event my dear neighbor becomes incapacitated or otherwise unable to care for him. She is in her seventies and the dog is barely two so the math is not on her side. I don't dislike dogs or animals for that matter but have no interest in having an animal in our home one way or another. It will be back to the pound with him should anything happen to her so we'll let nature take its course and not interfere or change that trajectory by doing something neighborly. Just sayin'.
Speaking of "seeing" I feel like I've been thrown off the stage and into the proverbial mosh pit where my illusory fans have now caught me and are rocking me from side to side keeping me both elevated and off my feet. I'm looking at the ceiling all of a sudden and I'm starting to see things I've never seen before. Never bothered to look at the "ceiling" before truth be told. Never been swept off my feet either so until someone tells me differently I think it's all good. But I'm staring small. Keeping the focus local and within arms reach. I'm seeing things around the house that I've not seen before. Things that have long been overlooked or perhaps even purposely avoided for one reason or other. How those observations occupy the space in my brain is another question. If they become manic in nature that is not a good thing. If I try to make up for decades of abuse or neglect in one fell swoop that may be a recipe for disaster. If my approach is orderly and methodical then I can understandably revel in the satisfaction one ordinarily gets from checking things off on their to-do list. The plans of mice and men are all well and good and thus far have not gone awry. My lists are intact; My daily goals modest and predictable; My learning curve steep but still in scope; and the results thus far have exceeded expectations. Maybe there is irony in the fact that the combined forces of energy and creativity that made me so successful at work are now in play in this post-work environment. Reminds me a little of the chicken and egg argument. The answer to that notwithstanding, it's full speed ahead here on the home front. Are we having fun yet?
Looks like Thanksgiving is going to be the same ole same ole this year. I wouldn't mind breaking with tradition and doing something a little different but that appears not to be in the cards. I'm listening to Arlo Guthrie's version of Alice's Restaurant on Sirius at the moment so I probably need to get with the program and get my head back in the game. With two elements gone in our stove, we have plans to have a new oven delivered the day before Thanksgiving so I can't use that as an excuse for not participating. I think the only thing we don't have aside from the oven is the turkey and I don't have a good reason for not collecting that sucker given my availability these days. I think it's safe to say my heart isn't in it this year. Have we beat that horse to death yet? Can you blame me for wanting to do something different? It isn't about you, Johnny boy. Never has been if you want to know the truth. Wake up and smell the coffee. Did I tell you that I was thinking about offering to walk our neighbors dog in the event she isn't up to it? I've decided it is probably not a good idea to open that door for a variety of reasons. Improbable as it seems, I don't want to become a default caretaker for the little fella in the event my dear neighbor becomes incapacitated or otherwise unable to care for him. She is in her seventies and the dog is barely two so the math is not on her side. I don't dislike dogs or animals for that matter but have no interest in having an animal in our home one way or another. It will be back to the pound with him should anything happen to her so we'll let nature take its course and not interfere or change that trajectory by doing something neighborly. Just sayin'.